Friday, June 30, 2006

Can't Touch This

Ow.

I haven't been to the gym in at least a couple months and I just this very moment, realized it. Somehow, I haven't gained or lost any weight which is why I had to stop and think about it.

My soon to be ex thought I should have a little backrub yesterday. Like I looked stressed or something. Upon this type of contact, the likes of which has been missing for quite some time, it seems all those meaty things holding my bones intact were at some point replaced in my sleep with thousands of rubber bands. Locked and loaded.

And my how they snapped. Is that what a tazer feels like? Anyone wanna come rollerblade up and down my back for a while?

So I have a theory. It must be that this consistent contracted state that all my muscles are currently in are burning calories and fat. Right? Stress is the new Weight Watchers.

Okay. I know it's really lame. But it's all I got right now.

4 comments:

Brad said...

If stress does indeed cause weight loss, why the hell am I on a diet?!

Alden said...

Well. It may also have to do with the fact I forget to eat when I'm thinking about other crap.

dpaste said...

Well, you need some kind of workout, that's for sure.

VJnet said...

Stress can also cause life loss. I hope you lose the stress :-)