And now, a prognostication.
I'm going to be discovered. I'm sure of it. One of these days, I will get sloppy and someone will kick me out of my cramped closet into the light of day. Probably by my office mate since I'm never sure if he's looking over my shoulder. Or my wife when she accidentally opens up my stash of beautiful boys on my laptop. Or perhaps an old friend that I have yet to meet that will come back to haunt me later. Some people may not truly care. Some people will be devestated. Some proud. Maybe I'm just fooling myself and people deep down already know and are just waiting for my own admission. Regardless, I will have to confront this like the careening carwreck I suspect it will be.
It would be amiss to not mention that it's an arousing prospect. As everyday passes I can feel myself becoming more accepting and comfortable about it. I do long for when I can actively satiate my appetite for romantic affections from a fine bedfellow. But still, when the portents race through my mind, I get petrified, frantic, and a slight sense of vertigo all to the point of practically peeing myself. I have no idea what will happen. I cannot tell when. It could be months, days, years, or tomorrow. It will happen.
And honestly... I certainly hope it does.